Getting Down To Business

[hotheadwarmheart]

Who: Lea and Aqua in one thread, Lea and anyone in the others
When: After the memory event, but before the next Isle trip
Where: Various places, see thread prompts
What: Now that the days are getting longer and the possibility of not being stuck inside any more looks imminent, Lea is feeling motivated. Time to get things done, some of which he's been putting off for awhile.
Warnings: Feels probably in the thread with Aqua. Otherwise, we'll see.

Fire And Water- Closed to Aqua

Another training session in the gym, virtually indistinguishable from most of the others since they'd been stuck inside. Though, this time, Lea hung back afterwards, looking thoughtful. "Aqua?", he said. "If you've got a few minutes, there's some things I want to talk to you about."

Magitek For Fun And Profit

Lea reading isn't that rare of a sight, but when one does spot him, he's usually curled up in one of the library's comfy chairs or stretched out the common room sofa with a cup of tea and either a stack of comic books or a YA novel or two. But today, Lea's seated at one of the library's tables. The cup of tea is still present nearby but his attitude is different, as is his choice of reading material. The book open in front of him looks more like a textbook or other nonfiction title than anything else, and he has a open notebook and pen right at hand, occasionally pausing in his reading to note things down. What is it that could have given Lea of all people the urge to study?

Let The Sun Shine In

Lea was walking through the greenhouse, but at present, his focus wasn't on any of the plants. Instead, he was looking up, carefully directing his magic to melt any lingering patches of snow on the roof. He knew his way around well enough to avoid stepping on any flowerbeds or bumping into tables, planters, or equipment racks. Most of the time, the only interruption might be if the ent got a little too curious about his hair, but that had mostly been solved by a few well placed colorful bangles hung from the ceiling on strings. But looking up does tend to make it easy to run into people or other non-stationary obstacles that might be on the walkways. Assuming you're not just trying to figure out what he's looking at.

Let There Be Light

Lea was rummaging through one of the supply closets, apparently looking for something. And without much success, by the sound of it. "Come on, they've gotta be here someplace," he said. "You'd think a school like this would have a whole crate or something of spares sitting around, but nooo..."

Comments

[aquawayfinder]

"I never thought about that, the fear. I'll give it some consideration," she said, seriously. She hadn't taken what they had seen that way, but if h had, it was worth looking into.

"As for the story, it is a short one, but one that seems to be relevant time and again. It is simply this. Once there were four blind men, great friends of old, who encountered an elephant for the first time. They had never heard of an elephant before and asked the handler to tell them about the creature. And the handler told them they could go ahead and touch the elephant, and then say what they think first.

"And so the four men did. One touched the tail and told the others that an elephant is thin and round like a snake. Another touched the elephant's flank and said that an elephant is massive and flat and tall. Another felt the elephant's leg and agreed to round, but massive. And the fourth touched the ear, and agreed with flat and thin. The four men started to argue, each sure of what he knew, and thus now thinking his friends had lied to him, and were insisting on their lies. It made them call into question all their friends had told them before. For each knew what they had felt, each knew what an elephant was. And when the handler was willing to explain, none of the men were willing to listen. To anyone. The four friends parted ways, friends no longer. Because each was certain in what they knew, because they had experienced it for themselves."

[hotheadwarmheart]

Lea listened to the story. "So... what I'm gathering is that clearly none of the people in this story can use basic logic or common sense," he said with a bit of an amused smirk. "I mean I get what it's trying to say too, but it's way more effective at saying 'think and investigate a little more before jumping to conclusions'. These guys should have had enough common sense to realize that if they were all touching the elephant and not standing right on top of each other, that it must be pretty big, so maybe they should feel around a little more. Especially the ones touching the ear and the tail; how did they find the ear or the tail without touching its head or its butt, respectively? The latter's kinda hard to do even when you can see, since elephant tails aren't that long and don't stick out from their body a lot."

"So yeah, not quite the intended moral there, story. But still not a bad one."

[aquawayfinder]

"It is an allegory, it isn't meant to be taken so literally," she said with a chuckle. "I suppose this is an insight into how Xion got to be the way she is," she teased gently.

[hotheadwarmheart]

"Hey, don't blame me for that," Lea said. "Even I don't understand how she thinks most of the time. Xion logic is not normal logic. But like I said, I know what moral it's trying to teach, I just think it does a bad job of it. And anyway we're getting off track."

He sighed. "I didn't start this conversation because I wanted to have a debate with you about the nature of justice, or Keyblades, or anything like that. I started it because I wanted you to know where I stood. But you know the crazy thing? If I hadn't spent the last couple years bumping around the multiverse, this might have been a real different story. Aside from the recruiting kids thing, as I was back then, I'd have been right with you. So much of my life at that point had just been spent going from one mission or crisis to the next, what was a few more? But then I got hauled to Diatu."

"Or more accurately, I should say, got hauled to the Tenscore Kingdoms. But most of my time there was spent in and around Diatu Magicademy so just calling it Diatu is easier. I was super ticked off at first; bad enough being magically kidnapped for no good reason, but then they had the nerve to say I had to go back to school and try to micromanage me? Yeah I wasn't having that. Almost got in a fistfight with someone on day one. I did settle down eventually of course, and it started to suck less when more of my friends started showing up. First Xion, who was actually there before me. Then Isa. Then Roxas, and briefly Sora. I started to settle into my classes, got to catch up with everyone, found a great, quirky ice cream place, made some new friends; things were going good. I helped the efforts to find a way to send us home of course but as it started to become an actual possibility... I realized that I didn't want to leave."

"We were safe there. I had my friends with me. There was no crisis we had to deal with, no psychos trying to kill us... Yeah weird magical stuff happened sometimes, but for the most part the biggest worries I had were homework. And I'd never have believed as a kid how nice it would be to be in that situation. In the end it was Isa who helped shake me out of my indecision and get back on track."

"But then, speaking of tracks, Xion and I got swept up by the Voidtreker Express. And it was back to dealing with missions and crises. A new world every month, a new problem that someone needed our help to solve. Got used to that too, made new friends and met old friends there too. But there was never any feeling of wanting to stay. The only regret I had at the end was having to leave the friends I'd made there."

"I though Xion and I'd be going home after that but no, we got dropped here. In a situation that left both of us with a lot of time on my hands.And Especially recently, time to think about what it is I really want. And thinking back over everything, I realized that it was what I had at Diatu that I missed the most. Not the location, but... the feeling. Isa was right when he said we couldn't stay there, but that feeling? That's what I want out of life. I want peace; not quite the kind I had as a kid because there's no getting that back, but as close to it as I can get. And I want it at home, with my friends. So much of my life has been spent fighting, but I can't be like you, and make a career out of it. I'll help if it's needed obviously, but the life of a Keyblade Master isn't the life for me. Not now."

[aquawayfinder]

"Lea..." she said gently, as she processed all that and tried to figure out how to explain what she wanted to say to that. She finally sighed. "I think perhaps I am a bad example," she shook her head. "When I was training... We were aware of the possibility for danger and we prepared for it... but we lived a lot the way you were describing with the school. The day before everything went horribly wrong our biggest worries were our Mastery exams and the fact that Ven wasn't allowed to test with us. We played games together after our homework was done, and our Master even joined us sometimes. We went out at night to watch the stars, got up some mornings to watch the sunrise. We had peace. And for most Keyblade Masters in history... that was what life was. Peace, but being prepared and preparing other to defend that peace if needed. The problem is... Well, problems, I suppose..."

She took a breath. "There is a saying. Well behaved people rarely make history. The first problem is exactly that. History books spend most of their breadth on intense but comparatively short times that came before. Going from, let's say the Mark of Mastery exam for me and Terra until the end of the war... It was less than 11 years. Then look at the years before that, and you have an exponentially longer time before you get to the last big conflict than was spent in that one. But History rarely talks about decades or centuries of peace. That's for cultural anthropologists, but as History is often a required course and most places do not even offer cultural anthropology as an option until after schooling is no longer compulsory. So the view most people get of history is framed entirely by conflict." She considered. "Though one history book I read at Master Xavier's school was absolutely an exception. It was called 1587, A Year Of No Significance. But that is beside the point. The point I am trying to make is that most Keyblade Masters did exactly what you said you liked best about Diatu. Learning, focusing on studies, being safe around people they cared about who were also safe. But the history that we learn rarely reflects that."

She sighed. "And of course the other problem is me. I'm not.... typical..." she said, slowly. "And if I am the only real example you have to go by then... I appologize. I can't stop being me, and I will not. But I appologize for the impression you get from me. I... am like a history book, I guess. I am trapped in the constant cycle of combat and danger so much so that it looks like that is all there is to my story. Because every time I see the Keyblade war end... I leave, and wind up in another reality where it is still raging, and I step in to help," her voice was soft then. She kept speaking, even though it hurt. "But it isn't that I don't want peace too. I do. If Ven and Terra arrived here tomorrow the temptation to stay.... it would be painful to not. But the guilt I would feel if they weren't my Terra and My Ven..." she shook her head. A tear falling. "That's why I have to keep moving on. Why I feel guilty staying here, even though I have no real choice in the matter. Because somewhere out there is a Terra and a Ven whose Aqua.... just vanished. They can't find me until I find our reality again. And... it is more than just one... And I do not think I could ever even begin to choose. I want home," she said quietly but emphatically, the words hurting to speak, but she spoke them. "But I'll never truly have it. Because I can't."

A deep breath, then she wiped her tears and got back on track. "But you can. Xion can. Roxas can." She tried to give him a smile, it wobbled a bit. "Being a Master wouldn't change that after the war the three of you can live in peace and just... be safe and happy. All it means is that you and those you would be teaching would be ready to protect that peace if it was again threatened. You wouldn't be seeking out that danger, Lea. You would just be ready to stand up and protect those you care about if that danger did come again. Statistically it would be highly unlikely, but we all know you can't rely on statistics. But if danger did come again, wouldn't you rather be there, ready and able to face it... rather than blindsided and unable to help until many hav already suffered?" she asked, softly, looking down at her hands. Almost as if she was asking herself as much as she was asking him.

[hotheadwarmheart]

Aqua... really wasn't getting it, was she? He never thought that talking to her could be as circular a conversation as talking to Xion could become, but here they were. It seemed he was going to have to spell it out for her. But first he had to address a few other things she'd brought up.

"I'm aware that I probably didn't get the best sample when it comes to time involved with Keyblades," he said. "But that sample is still 100% of my experience with them. And with all due respect, that kind of peace isn't the same thing as what I'm talking about. I'm not talking about relaxing but being on guard and prepared to pull out a weapon at a moment's notice if need be. I'm talking about the kind of peace where you can put down your weapons and drop your guard entirely because you know it's safe. You know there's no danger and that nothing will harm you. That you're 100% safe. I had something close to that in Diatu. And I want it again; properly this time."

"And I've had to deal with meeting alternate versions of my friends too, but honestly, I think you've got it wrong. I've thought about this a lot too, and decided that Xion is Xion. And Roxas is Roxas. Maybe they're not from the same version of things as I am, but well... having been a Nobody give you kinda a unique perspective on what it means to be 'the' version of a person. Every Roxas and every Xion is my best friend, because I know any version of me would be theirs. Even if a couple dozen versions of them both showed up here- after we finished handing out ID-tags because man, that'd be confusing-it'd just mean I'd have a bunch more friends. And a bunch more homes, because they'd be a part of mine now and I'd be a part of theirs."

"But the bottom line is, eventually, you're gonna make it back to your native world. Whether it's next week, next month, or a decade from now, you'll make it back. And when you do? That's probably gonna be it. More multiversal shenanigans aside, you're probably not gonna have a choice about staying there any more than you do here. And you'll get used to it because well, life happens. You'll have stuff to do things to arrange, plans to make, and before you know it you'll realize that you made a choice almost without intending to. Gradually, over days and weeks and months and years, you'll have chosen home."

"As for the rest of it..." He sighed. "Aqua, I don't need you to convince me that I might make a good Master. I'm aware of that. I might also make a good dentist, or ballet dancer, or rodeo clown, but that's not the point. It doesn't matter how good I'd be at any of those things because I've decided that that isn't what I'm going to do with my life. This isn't me looking for encouragement or a morale boost; this is me informing you, as my teacher and my friend, that I have made a decision and explaining how I arrived at it. No more, no less. Got it memorized?"

[aquawayfinder]

From the look on her face when he explained his idea of the kind of safety that he wanted... well the utter bafflement might explain a lot of their disconnect. Because she clearly was having trouble even imagining that. But she was doing her best, for his sake.

When he said the part about her getting back to her origin world eventually, she nodded. And when he finished she took a deep breath. "A few things. That choice you said I'd find I'd made? It's already been made. I find my way back there, to the Terra and Ven that have never had any other Aqua other than me? To the Isle where our students will be coming back and need Masters to teach them, to a world that thinks different is wrong... I already chose. That is where my home will be, where my home is. Getting back there, and staying there... that has been my goal for longer than I can remember. That world needs me as much as any other reality has and..." a soft voice as she looked out at the middle distance again. "I need it. That's why nowhere else has ever felt like home, Lea. Because I already have one. And I know it. It will hurt saying goodbye to the friends I have made along the way," she admitted. "But your realities all have an Aqua. And like you said... she'll still be me. She might not have my memories of my time with you.. but you will. And I am sure you will be able to bring her up to speed, emotionally."

She sighed a bit. Shook her head. "I understand what you are saying, and I will do my best not to push anymore. I just... as you say, one day I will be gone. This me. And I don't know what the me I am leaving behind will be like. I want to do what I can to make sure your world will stay safe."

She leaned her head back and rolled her shoulders a bit. "But I'll do my best to push you less about becoming a Master in that sense. But that doesn't mean going easier on you in training. Whatever your choice for after the battles are won... you still have to get to that point. If I get to leave here with you, that's easy enough. I can protect you all long enough to end it and tell you how to save your world's version of me to be there for you when I leave. But there is always the chance I can't. And I want to know you all will survive, if you have to fight without me there."