May Your Heart Be Your Guiding Key Until We Meet Again - OTA

[aquawayfinder]

Open/locked?: Open
Who: Aqua and whomsoever finds her
What: Noticing her friends are missing
Warnings: Angst, sadness, possible war mentions. Kingdom Hearts nonsense.


Aqua was concerned when Æn'kae did not show up for morning lessons. She ran her class of course, planning to look for him after. Sadly, she couldn't find him. She waited until later in the day to check with Rren, and found them gone as well.

She'd seen this before, friends vanishing from a hub world, with no warning. So this was not a first. But still, it was a sad thing, and she would miss them.

Aqua was the Master of her emotions, not the other way around, but she was Master by way of actually feeling her feelings. So she could be found in the afternoon, once again up on the roof of the school, legs crossed, eyes closed as she meditated through her feelings. But she was willing to speak to anyone even while meditating, or while searching. And of course she always had time for her students in morning class.

Comments

[hotheadwarmheart]

"No offense, Aqua, that that's probably the least convincing lie I've ever heard," he said. "It's OK to not be OK, ya know? To not be the big, strong, in control Master. I'll wait here with you as long as it takes." He had some thing he needed to say to her, but... not til she was OK.

[aquawayfinder]

"Not.. a lie... Didn't say when..."

But if he wasn't going to leave then she had to pull herself together. For him if not for herself. She had to. She just... needed a moment to find her center again.

[hotheadwarmheart]

"Well now I know you're doing a little better," he said giving a bit of a wry smile. "You're trying to argue technicalities with me."

"Seriously though, take as long as you need. No need to try and rush yourself. I've played 20 Thousand Questions and dealt with what seems like just as many panic attacks with Xion; I can be patient."

[aquawayfinder]

"I am a Master..." she said slowly. Taking deep breaths. "That means that if I really had to... I could push through this. But since I don't... I know... giving myself the time... is better than to force it..."

Feel free to skip to her feeling better.

[hotheadwarmheart]

"Exactly," Lea said. He then sat back on the ground and waited.

Okay

[aquawayfinder]

It took her several minutes of quiet and focus to pull herself together enough that she could, laying on her back, cast a Cureaga that finished the healing. She took a deep breath then vanished both her Keyblade and her armor. The later had the unsettling motion of all but crawling into he arm band in a way that wasn't quite usual Keyblader magic.

She pushed herself up to sit crosslegged. "I appologize for my weakness," she said, formally.

[hotheadwarmheart]

"Eh, don't worry about that," Lea said waving off her apology. "Happens to everybody sometimes."

"I'm more wondering about what caused it in the first place. What even was that move you pulled? I mean I thought I was supposed to be the reckless one out of the two of us."

[aquawayfinder]

"I..."

If she was going to teach him, he deserved to know.

"I wasn't certain I would be made Master when I was. I thought that I had an exploitable weakness that would prevent it. I have a fear of heights. Of falling. My Master told me that it wasn't having a fear or not having fears that made a Master, it was if the fear would Master me, or if I could, when I need to, master the fear. To save someone I can do what I need to, despite being afraid. Once the danger is over, however, it... sometimes takes me a bit to find my center again. I can push it aside for a time, if I need to, but resolving it sooner rather than later is better for everyone when I can do it without harming others. When I saw what looked like you falling... My fear of you getting hurt was worse than my fear of heights. But once you were okay and I had fallen..."

A deep breath.

"Mastery takes constant work, even after passing the exam. Clearly I still have more work to do."

[hotheadwarmheart]

Lea quirked an eyebrow. "Well I was originally just gonna take the stairs," he said, "but then you suggested finding a faster way down. And since the glider is your thing, I thought you meant for me to find my own way. Besides, you don't really think I'm dumb enough to just jump off a roof like that without a plan, do you?"

[aquawayfinder]

"After your reaction to my feelings about Roxas jumping off my glider into a moving car? Yes. Before that, no. And I had been intending to offer you a ride down on my glider, in armor."

[hotheadwarmheart]

"Well it's nice to know what your estimate of my intelligence is, I guess," Lea said, snark coming to the fore now that he no longer had reason to be concerned. "But seriously, you're forgetting that Roxas is what, two or three years old, max? I may be reckless, but I've long since grown out of that level of stupid; I know my own limits for the most part and I know how far I can push them."

[aquawayfinder]

"And you've never been tempted to ignore those limits to show off? And before you answer, may I remind you that I have brothers?" Her brows where in her hairline.

[hotheadwarmheart]

"Oh absolutely," he said. "But if I was gonna do that, I'd have made a much bigger show of it, and made sure to do it when more than just you were watching. No fun showing off for just you, since chances are when it comes to anything but fire magic you can already do it better than me."

[aquawayfinder]

She rubbed at her forehead. "You understand how this is not helping your case, yes?"

[hotheadwarmheart]

Now Lea was annoyed. "Look, you're not my mom," he said. "If I do something I know is stupid and past my limits it's my own stupid fault, and I'll deal with the consequences like a big boy. I might learn the hard way sometimes, but I do learn. And I can take care of myself; I've been doing it since I was 14. "

[aquawayfinder]

"You shouldn't have had to do it since so young. I am not your mother, no. But I am your friend, and I am someone who cares about you. And the consequences will not just affect you, and you know that. You have accepted responsibility for Xion and Roxas, and while it may not be fair that you have had to do that, you have done that."

[hotheadwarmheart]

"Don't you think I know that?", Lea said. "Why do you think I make it so clear these days when I'm about to do something stupid? Or train with you? Or do half the things I do anymore? Believe me, I know."

"But let's not forget that this situation only happened because you freaked out. I was fine and in control the whole time. And for your information, I wouldn't have needed armor just to hitch a ride down from the tower with you even if I'd realized that's what you wanted. Maybe I'm too reckless sometimes, but you're too cautious."

[aquawayfinder]

"I do think you know it, but I also think that all of us - and I include myself in this - sometimes push ourselves too far and too hard without stopping to think of the people who rely on us, who depend on us." Can you hear the sting of when she's had this lecture herself? Recently.

She took a deep breath to center herself. "While you might consider me cautious, I assure you, from the lectures I have received, you are in the minority."

She was torn between wishing she could send Lea to talk to Æn'kae about this and relieved that she couldn't.

[hotheadwarmheart]

"You know, at this point I might well pay munny to see someone give you a lecture?", he said. "Except that whoever was lecturing would probably turn around and lecture me even more afterwards, which would kill any enjoyment I got out of it."

He sighed, scrubbing a hand over his face. "Look let's just... agree that we both probably could've been a little clearer on what we were planning, and to just take the stairs from now on. Sound good?"

[aquawayfinder]

"Not sure Æn'kae would have a reason to lecture you.... but I could be wrong. I agree with us communicating better though. And the stairs."

[hotheadwarmheart]

Lea nodded, then gave a rueful grin. "On the bright side of all this, I did get a bit of magic practice in," he said. "So mission failed successfully, I guess?"

[aquawayfinder]

She gave a small chuckle. "That is one way to see it, I suppose."