"I am not trying to be heroic or noble, Lea," she said with a sigh. "I am trying to live up to my responsibilities. It isn't about anyone deserving more or less than anyone else. I got Enki and Rren and their friends dragged into the Keyblade war in our reality. And I became a Master, which makes training and aiding the Keyblade's chosen my responsibility as well. That the oath is based upon the expectation that there are other Masters actively teaching does not lessen what I promised to do. Then add to that that all of you are people I care about... Of course I am going to help. It is selfish, maybe to want to help one's friends, but that is an acceptable form of selfishness. Knowing the people I love are okay is self care. It takes worries off of me. So wanting to help you guys is for your sake, my sake, and because it is a responsibility all at the same time. I am not trying to martyr myself. I've done that before, I know the difference. And the standard I am trying to live up to is the one in my own heart, passed down to me from my Master when he was raising and training us. From a number of Masters I've known and respected."
And if she couldn't measure up... then maybe she really had been made a Master too soon... At the time she had been sure she was ready. Now... she was second guessing. Not that there was anything she could do about it at the moment.
no subject
Date: 2023-04-18 08:20 am (UTC)And if she couldn't measure up... then maybe she really had been made a Master too soon... At the time she had been sure she was ready. Now... she was second guessing. Not that there was anything she could do about it at the moment.